It seems like every high school in the Philippines has an open secret: teachers are flirting with their own (underage) students… or worse. Don’t even try to call it anything other than what it is. There is a rampant problem of sexual abuse in schools, and it needs to stop.
First off, I would like to start this article with a content warning. I would also appreciate it if you could comment hotlines or organizations our readers can call in the Philippines specifically for child sexual abuse survivors.
Yes, it does.
If you’re a student, then a teacher from your high school probably entered your mind reading this. I can recall stories of people from different schools talking about it when we were in high school. Furthermore, a quick look into the Twitterverse will reveal that these things do happen in the Philippines.
It’s probably the giant elephant in the faculty room, too. If rumors are already swirling around the student population, then the teachers must already know that something fishy is going on. The question is, why is nobody doing something about it? Are they unaware, or do they choose to turn a blind eye to keep the peace?
The most difficult thing to handle for me is that we didn’t even know how messed up the whole situation was when we were still in high school. I remember hearing about teachers who flirted with their students or asked for their nudes, and no one really batted an eyelash. And for those who are unaware, yes, there were also some accounts of worse sexual activities being done.
Back then, these things would be the punchline of a joke, or just mere gossip to talk about during recess.
But only now, five years after leaving high school, do I realize that I was so vulnerable back then. It literally gives me chills knowing that I walked the halls with sexual predators disguised as teachers. It could’ve been me. Worse, I feel guilty for being so apathetic about this issue back then. I could’ve been friends with a survivor of sexual abuse, but I didn’t know a lot about the issue.
Most of what I know about the effects of sexual abuse in schools, I only knew after I had graduated. Even though I can’t turn back time to fix my mistakes from the past, now that I know better.
Before anything, let’s define what sexual abuse is. According to The National Child Trauma Stress Network, child sexual abuse includes both touching and non-touching behaviors, and occurs when a child is used for the sexual stimulation of the perpetrator. While it is often equated with child molestation, there is a semantic issue with using that term, because it is mainly associated with only physical acts. Sexual abuse on the other hand, is not just about using physical force. And that fact is important to high school students who may not know that they’re actually being sexually abused right in front of their eyes.
Let’s work with the definition that we have and see what teachers do that counts as sexual abuse. This list is thanks to the folks at National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children.
If you’re a sexual predator reading this list and didn’t see your actions above, you’re still not off the hook. Child sexual exploitation refers to giving a child anything (usually money or food) in return for sexual activities. On the other hand, child grooming is when a predator “prepares” a child for sexual activity later on, usually when they’re of legal age. When grooming a child, predators may also establish an emotional connection with them and their loved ones.
If that didn’t get you, then know that you’re a pedophile if you’re attracted to people who have not reached puberty yet. Needless to say, that is nothing to be proud of… and it’s illegal. In the Philippines, sexual activity with someone under 18 constitutes child abuse and exploitation.
Honestly, the fact that there are so many types of child abuse is disgusting. How many people on earth had to be preyed on for these distinctive terms to pop up?
Sexual abuse is often associated with anxiety, depression, guilt, shame, and self-blame. It is not uncommon for survivors to develop body issues and eating disorders as they grow older. They are also prone to suicidal thoughts, and may lead to self-harm. Unfortunately, the effects stay with them until they’re adults with many of them suffering from complex post-traumatic stress disorder.
Listen, this isn’t journalism. I am no expert on this deep matter and this article is something that I just had to get off my system after hearing some disturbing news about my high school. With that said, to students who have experienced or witnessed sexual abuse in schools, I want to link you to some resources instead.
If you’re a student who feels like they’ve been sexually abused, you can refer to this article to know some things you can do to help you through this. Know that legal action is an available option when you’re ready.
If you’re a friend of someone who was sexually abused, you can take a look at this article to learn how you can support them. Although this one is about sexual assault, the “how you can help” section is pretty applicable to someone who has gone through sexual abuse. Lastly, this article about traumatic events with input from counselors goes into more detail about how to go about it.
Finding online resources addressed to sexual abuse victims and their friends is shockingly difficult. I now realize that there is a need for us to talk about this issue openly to children. We shouldn’t just be talking to adults about sexual abuse in schools. Hey, children are the ones going through this, and they’re always online too. They need to know what they can and should do during moments of vulnerability. Yes, it is a heavy topic to discuss, but we should also do our part in destigmatizing it. In that way, the survivors would be able to feel less guilt and shame talking about their experience.
Parents, I have nothing to ask from you but to please believe your child. Whether they themselves are the survivors or not, please believe that what they’re saying is true. Looking at them like they’re crazy for bringing up sexual abuse in school is a slap in the face. If you must know, many child abuse cases go unreported, and the fear of not being believed by others may be a huge reason why.
As I’ve mentioned, these things happen, even in gender-exclusive schools. Even to boys. And yes, the sex of the teacher doesn’t matter; a predator is a predator.
It’s difficult, but please discuss these things with your child, even before you see signs of sexual abuse. Help with destigmatizing the issue. And to the parents who have developed an emotional connection with a teacher accused of sexual abuse, please do not take their side over a student’s. You do not want to be on the wrong side in this one.
Lastly, be an ally to students. This is mostly applicable for private schools, but know that you can always make an impact by speaking out with other parents about this. The school will probably listen to you more than their students.
Teachers, you have no idea how much students look up to you. In a way, you set the tone of how the school is run. This is why your silence on the matter is pretty appalling. If you choose to dismiss the rumors you hear about your colleagues, then the students will probably stay silent too. We know you know. So for the good of everyone, stop normalizing this behavior and use your voice! Confront who you need to confront.
Also, in the off-chance a student opens up to you about your colleague, believe them, and do something about it. Here is a resource to get you started.
So in short, please, I ask you not to protect your colleagues. More than anyone, you’d probably know the right people to talk to so that things would actually change.
Here is a great educational piece on teachers sexually abusing students. And another one! But do you really need articles to know what the right thing to do is? It’s simple: stop putting the school’s reputation over your students’ welfare. Stop hiding these sexual abuse cases. Walk your talk.
If you don’t, I promise you that it’s going to bite you in the ass one day. The kids today know better.
I am encouraging everyone who is comfortable enough to share their thoughts about sexual abuse in schools on Twitter with the hashtag, #MySchoolHiresPredators.
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Every high school talaga? Hasty generalization.
Hi Anon, hope you're having a beautiful morning! I did only say "it seems like every high school". Obviously, it's not every high school, just like how literally not all men are trash. But I believe this is a problem wide enough in scope that high schools need to be correlated with sexual abuse. Worse is these cases usually go unreported which is why it doesn't seem like an issue.